教书生涯？

被人‘逼问’为什么有好好的老师不做？浪费了一个好老师？其实我没有‘认真’考虑过这个问题。只是，对于这个朋友，我努力的想着什么样的回答会对她有帮助。我怎么告诉她，我在最后教书的2年常常告诉学生不用读这么多的，数学不会不要紧，以后会用计算机就可以了，学习是很重要可是如果没有求知欲学习是不会发生的（Learning will never occur when there is no urge to learn)。我在想如果她的女儿回来这么告诉她她的老师这么说，她一定想，快点去找补习老师，你这个老师beh iong（不能用）了。我又怎么告诉她，我当着精英班的学生说，你们的SPM文凭纸，除了擦屁股之外，别无他用，因为中五毕业之后，放你在街边你会饿死，如果爸爸妈妈没有给你钱的话。。。。有些生活的体验，非三言两语能告知。有些生命的体会，也非一天两天就能传达。达摩祖师曰：“道本圆成，不用修证。道非声色，微妙难见。如人饮水，冷暖自知，不可向人说也。”是的，“如人饮水，冷暖自知。”。。。抱歉呵朋友，我实在没有办法给你一个满意的答案，因为这牵涉我这个人生的历练，实在不懂得如何简短的告知，有让你误解的部分请见谅。 很多人都很纳闷为什么我辞职。我的理由，可以很广，见人讲人话，见鬼讲鬼话。其实，这份恬静的生活，是只有自己了解的。 这个片里的朋友，Sam，是我学生的哥哥，在一个恰合的因缘下，我们有机会认识。那时，我和Yao都觉得志同道合的人，冥冥中就是会相聚。 Sam的离职，看来是和社会对立的。 我的离职（在工厂和后来的教育界），也看来是不理智的，为什么要离开铁饭碗，和‘多余的钱’过意不去。 可是，我们何必和繁忙的工作混合呢？ 有意义的事，只要从心开心，我们要的，都触手可及。 你，会寻找你内心的声音吗？ 祝福你，祝福我。：） https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=10150510790426916

午觉虫

突然间想起，小学开始我就是午觉虫，五年级那年考检定考试前，在佛学班接触了五戒，竟然傻乎乎的和自己说要发愿持不杀戒，结果就是那时起劫杀蚊虫。同一年，检定考试就中状元免读预备班。中三那年，有个朋友说念大悲咒有助增长智慧，结果每晚睡前必念数遍，有时还加心经，心中很想参与经赞组。可是似乎没有机会晚间出来，但是那一年，我依然午觉+电视照看+家庭‘暴乱’，SRP还是过关斩将了。大学时期，午觉依然是不可以缺少的生活条件，图书馆bilik tutorial等等都是我闭目养神的好地方。生老大时metta chanting就是我的力量；生老二时，诵了2部的地藏经--不需什么epidural或止痛针或催生。持戒的福报，持咒的力量，向佛的心，坚定的心力，这点点滴滴，都是想来，很感恩很感恩的事。没有什么神通可言，只有满满的法喜。....纯属留给自己的记录。

热闹。喧哗

曾经这么说过，“以前我以为我的孩子“太内向”，现在我明白了，沒有電視，沒有電動玩具，是太懂得和自己相处，所以不需要喧哗。” 虽然，现在每天放学后，小瓜们都要热闹一番，但是，这种热闹，不属于寂寞难耐的喧哗，反而是带着搞笑的多一点。 大概是知道妈妈一整天没见到她们了，所以就来场午间胡闹吧。

National Day

In the spirit of National Day, the kids and I are enjoying this song while contemplating what we can do to serve the nation. The old wise man studied knowledge and gained wisdom so that they could serve better to the nation....They didnt study to get more As or more money. “Kerana perpaduan，Kita masih bersama” Kerana keamanan di tanahairku yang bebas dari bencana alam, kita masih lagi bernafas. 古人圣贤先修道，即修养道德，是为了齐身齐家再齐国，而非为了多少赚多少钱，因为长养的是对名利的贪染。 佛法上的四重恩：“父母恩，国家恩，众生恩，三宝恩。”真的是，没有父母就没有我们，没有国家就不会有平安的家园。 国庆。感恩这片土地，让我平安的渡过了这么多年。 -------- Once again, today we took different mode of transportation. As we were taking the ferry and bus ride back to kampung, the kids learnt to read signboards like "Penumpang berjalan kaki sahaja.","Sila berada di kenderaan masing2." JE was 'forced' to go to information counter to ask for which platform to go to. We walked together with many races....towards one direction. We(the kids, myself and all other people on the platform) sweat together like smelly bulls in the hot sun. We waited for unscheduled bus to board. We squeezed in the bus without the need to line up coz this was our culture.....but no one would get hurt. We get coop up in the bus, not to mention the spoiled curtain that was not doing any good to block the sunlight for 45 minutes. Finally, we hop down the bus and 'jalan kaki' balik. I thought how lucky the kids were ---- that they were able to experience wonderful experience like this. :) 能吃得苦的孩子，才能拥有幸福的未来，不是吗？ 感恩这旅程，让我们有个圆满学习。

换愿望

给他们自己准备午餐。今天是番薯泥，烫青豆，烫玉蜀黍，煎蛋，加面包。 竺妤削了番薯皮，柔帆切成番薯块，放进锅里煮。煮熟了，竺妤再压烂。 煎了蛋。 香喷喷的美食下肚后，竺妤说，我要换愿望了，我要做厨师。^.^ 不问，都知道她多么享受那个烹饪的过程了。

我喜欢印度人和马来人

阿柔又再发表‘歪论’了。 妈咪，你知道吗，我喜欢印度人和马来人的。 为什么？ 因为呵，如果我晒黑太阳晒黑的话，会给人以为我是马来人印度人，可是如果是马来人印度人的话，他们怎样晒都不要紧，不会晒黑的。

Unschooling spirit

1. JV said she was pretending herself like a train....humming 'choo choo' while she was walking down the stair case of Jing Si Tang. But she stopped humming it and stopped moving her hands like the locomotive trains when there were people coming up from the downstairs. 2. Curry was hot. JV took a piece of ice and tried to ease that spicy feeling. As the ice cube didnt melt soon, she placed her fish meat on top of the ice cube and pretended that she was 'driving' a ice-cube boat....letting the ice-cube boat to move around her bowl. 3. JV refused to let her bolster covered with the new cover i made her for her birthday. Reason: she wanted to learn those words like 'hippopotamus','butterfly', etc which were printed on the inner cover. 'I have learned the word "hippopotamus". But i have not yet spelled "butterfly",'She said. Now that left me dumb founded......how could i resist her learning? That's how she learnt....always learnt from anything and everything around her. No wonder she didnt use much time to adapt to learning of Ejaan when she entered Std 1....though she only started to learn them when she entered primary school. Unschooling spirit seemed to have rooted in her. That's how imaginative she can be.....

给孩子的尊重

看到了过去的学生的部落格那么写着自己，“我想老师也搞不懂我在念的是什么科系，但是她就只问了我一个问题，这科是你想要念的吗？那是我突然之间冒出了莫名感动。老师，你的这一道问题可以看到你对学生的关心是不一样的。因为其他老师通常都会问，你这科念完后可以…什么又什么的…？” 。 我有莫名的伤感。难道真的没有别的老师可以往孩子的心灵上建绿洲吗？我多么希望我不是那个唯一给孩子那份尊重的老师，要不然学校就会更快变成沙漠了。 久别了，学校！然而，教育的工作，我想我还是在耕耘着。http://jackgohstep.blogspot.com/2012/01/blog-post_29.html. For awhile, i wept and wept. knowing the fact that little acts and stories can touch a life. as what Rudolf Steiner had mentioned, "it is not what you teach that matters, it is who you really are that matters." 在庙会，遇到了旧时的学生。当年，成绩平平，但学习态度很好的，都上了大学，见到老师也会问候一番。这孩子，当年，终是在吃了东西来教务处会问‘蠢蠢’的数学问题，能够为他解答，是我的幸福，他的热诚深深让我感动。当年，也有几个成绩平平的孩子，都上了大学，还有一个拿着master in biology---他的最爱，他说他的数学很懒，我说我的数学也不见得好，我记得的是他不放弃的精神。还有一个孩子，在pasar malam 见到时，已经是某公司的automobile engineer，还在进修着master,当年是成绩放牛班的一分子，他说经常借故’旷课’，但是我没有印象，只记得他是个很有礼貌的孩子。回顾这些孩子，让他们‘成功’的，都是因为他们有着谦卑的礼仪，愿意向老师长辈请教的学习态度

Hari Interaksi Ibu Bapa

Hari Interaksi Ibu Bapa: A day that i really looked forward to understand a child better, to uplift a child's spirit, to share with parents on why we should encourage a child more, to educate on the importance of learning and not the marks alone. A mother happily said today she learnt something. A father looked up with hope and joy. Many 13 yrs old went back with hope. These are the backlog Remove class.....which i believe one day they will persevere and enter university. 家长交流日-一直是我期待的日子，让我可以和家长分享学习的态度--不以成绩为导，以愉快学习为先锋，可以让孩子看到未来他们是可以的。一个妈妈说今天她学了很多。还有一个爸爸看来充满了希望因为他大概知道怎么去引发孩子的学习而不是只看孩子的成绩因为他的女儿是运动健将。这群放牛班的预备班孩子似乎都对前途有了希望。。。。因为我相信他们。感恩让我在孩子的身上看到了《爱》。

Teaching "The Earth, the Moon and the Sun" - inspired by Waldorf

Inspired by Waldorf way of teaching. I led the students to go through this session with my fresh from the oven wet-on-wet painting and also simple form drawing. Painting was done the night before....within 1 hour. Fairly done form drawing was done 15 mins before the lesson....i still have much improvement to go. To be fair to the students who were taking Science in English. All the lessons were conducted in English. I spoke with slow pace and they were able to follow. When they dont understand words like "Wheat". I explained, "It grows only in the US and China, not in M'sia." I drew it out on the board too. And they can understand well. Give them time and they will be able to follow. I dont use Chinese to teach.....this is unfair to them and underestimate their ability to learn. With this, i conclude, if Waldorf education cant be a philosophy to you, at least it can be a way of living. If not, it can be a methodology that works well and is able to compliment the current teacher center approach in the classroom environment.

善因的种子

摇晃后，昨晚，吃过了八分饱的晚餐，我们与孩子一起唱着这首《誠心祈三願》祈愿，老大还跟随哼着Metta Chanting。我们都有心惊的一刻，更何况活在地震区域的众生们。孩子后来把积蓄拿出来，要救灾苦难的人（虽然后来都平安），然而一颗善心就在此时萌起。善心的萌起，既是善因的种子。我想，从今要教育孩子会更容易了。感恩我在这片土地，虽然马来西亚并不完美。阿弥陀佛！：）