Found this words, "I also found happiness in learning to be a “good enough” mother and teacher, and learned to let go of perfect." in a blog.
I was hearing my heart trembled with joy and tears.
Joy coz i think i just found myself in a situation of "trying to be a perfect" mother.
Tears coz i think i am letting go the thought of "being a perfect" mother.
It is so touched and also full of some degree of worry(not fear).... but who knows what will happen tomorrow?
All will be answered with my prayers......
I have worries, but so what, they are not out of fear.
But simply due to not-knowing-what will happen tomorrow.
May i be blessed with strength and peace and harmony.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
关于华德福
有时候我会很期待这种教育制度的落实。但更多时候，其实只是我个人对自己的生活态度的一个期许。若非沃道夫，我想很多现代的教育制度都要因为竞争和怕输而叫孩子走向人性的腐败了。感恩这世纪末出现的一个美丽的灵魂---RUDOLF STEINER.
不懂为什么，就是有很多的感动。不懂感动什么。
是因为有机会与亲爱的柔柔多点时间吗？
-- 虽然有点害怕不懂日后他会怪我没把她留下在幼儿园。
还是因为感动自己敢于放下工作，再次更全面的去陪伴孩子共成长？
-- 虽然都明明不知道自己会不会做得和老师一样好。
看了《愚人买鞋》。 就一直想，为什么我不相信自己，切要相信外面的准绳?
不懂为什么，就是有很多的感动。不懂感动什么。
是因为有机会与亲爱的柔柔多点时间吗？
-- 虽然有点害怕不懂日后他会怪我没把她留下在幼儿园。
还是因为感动自己敢于放下工作，再次更全面的去陪伴孩子共成长？
-- 虽然都明明不知道自己会不会做得和老师一样好。
看了《愚人买鞋》。 就一直想，为什么我不相信自己，切要相信外面的准绳?
Monday, August 9, 2010
A prayer in the early morning
This was JE Tzu Chi Sunday school mini sport day. Everybody was looking forward to it and teachers and some parents have even came to the field a day earlier to get the lines and tents ready.
But it was raining heavily since the early Sunday morning. It was very obvious that their hard work of the past few weeks in preparing the mini sport day looked like was going to be a waste. Raindrops kept pouring in… non stop.
Children were complaining with disappointment. But the teachers were not going to give up this moment. Teachers shared about their hard work for the past weeks and told the children that why complain when those who put in hard work were the teachers and parents. It seemed to be quite a human nature that whenever we see things not going our way, we start to complain and express our disappointment.
Then the teachers started to lead all the students, with eyes closed, in a prayer that has the lyrics of 3 main wish, i.e.:
1. May we be free from all sufferings and hatred.
2. May the world be blessed with peace and harmony
3. May our minds be purified to be as clear as the early dawn.
And thus with the blessings from the Lord Buddha, after the first round of this prayer, it seemed that the thick black cloud which was enveloping the sky has started to move away.
With all hearts, the students and teachers continued to recite and sing this prayer again and again.
Then…..when they started to open their eyes again, one could not believe their eyes but to contemplate on the bright sky.
Here, is the power of prayers…..
Prayer for the mind and body
Praying not only for ourselves, but also for the betterment of all beings..
Here, is the great compassion, that when it proliferate, will make all being is great state of healthy mind and body.
But it was raining heavily since the early Sunday morning. It was very obvious that their hard work of the past few weeks in preparing the mini sport day looked like was going to be a waste. Raindrops kept pouring in… non stop.
Children were complaining with disappointment. But the teachers were not going to give up this moment. Teachers shared about their hard work for the past weeks and told the children that why complain when those who put in hard work were the teachers and parents. It seemed to be quite a human nature that whenever we see things not going our way, we start to complain and express our disappointment.
Then the teachers started to lead all the students, with eyes closed, in a prayer that has the lyrics of 3 main wish, i.e.:
1. May we be free from all sufferings and hatred.
2. May the world be blessed with peace and harmony
3. May our minds be purified to be as clear as the early dawn.
And thus with the blessings from the Lord Buddha, after the first round of this prayer, it seemed that the thick black cloud which was enveloping the sky has started to move away.
With all hearts, the students and teachers continued to recite and sing this prayer again and again.
Then…..when they started to open their eyes again, one could not believe their eyes but to contemplate on the bright sky.
Here, is the power of prayers…..
Prayer for the mind and body
Praying not only for ourselves, but also for the betterment of all beings..
Here, is the great compassion, that when it proliferate, will make all being is great state of healthy mind and body.
Saturday, July 31, 2010
Gratitude in this great morning 感恩的早晨
I was cleaning the water defrosting from the old fridge, and have deep gratitude towards this old machine which has been storing food for me.
Picked up my little kancil from the mechanic, and have deep gratitude towards this little old 'deer' which has brought me to many places safely & timely. RM 110 paid. And I am so happy for Uncle Chao to have it. He must have spent a lot of time trouble shooting. :)
After the rain, it was so delightful to see raining water dripping fr the trees, as though snow flakes are falling from it! We were rushing for time while watching this, but no, we are not running out of time. Life is always a bliss to be. We were just in joyful state to be able to contemplate this. What a wonderful sight!
Have deep gratitude towards the postman who politely explained why my parcel was detained. This is a parcel full of love.
Gratitude! Such is the precious Dharma in daily life, every moment and every thing.
- 一面洗着老雪柜，一面很感恩这老机器，因为有了它，我的食物得以储存。
- 从老财叔的手中接过老灵鹿，感恩老灵鹿这十多年来的陪伴，伴我走过山陵（真的啊。难忘的和AHMAD师兄之旅），伴我结善缘。感恩老财叔的用心，要医老车毛病，还真得花心思呢。：）
-赶路的时候，感恩有缘让我们看到下雨后的树还在下着雪花式的小雨点，只有在风和树和未干的小雨结合下才看到呵。
-感恩邮差叔叔把我的包裹用心的留在邮政局里。这国家不是没希望的，就看什么因缘底下和什么相应。
感恩！感恩！感恩！佛法无不在生活上。佛法原本就在生命中的每一分每一秒。
Picked up my little kancil from the mechanic, and have deep gratitude towards this little old 'deer' which has brought me to many places safely & timely. RM 110 paid. And I am so happy for Uncle Chao to have it. He must have spent a lot of time trouble shooting. :)
After the rain, it was so delightful to see raining water dripping fr the trees, as though snow flakes are falling from it! We were rushing for time while watching this, but no, we are not running out of time. Life is always a bliss to be. We were just in joyful state to be able to contemplate this. What a wonderful sight!
Have deep gratitude towards the postman who politely explained why my parcel was detained. This is a parcel full of love.
Gratitude! Such is the precious Dharma in daily life, every moment and every thing.
- 一面洗着老雪柜，一面很感恩这老机器，因为有了它，我的食物得以储存。
- 从老财叔的手中接过老灵鹿，感恩老灵鹿这十多年来的陪伴，伴我走过山陵（真的啊。难忘的和AHMAD师兄之旅），伴我结善缘。感恩老财叔的用心，要医老车毛病，还真得花心思呢。：）
-赶路的时候，感恩有缘让我们看到下雨后的树还在下着雪花式的小雨点，只有在风和树和未干的小雨结合下才看到呵。
-感恩邮差叔叔把我的包裹用心的留在邮政局里。这国家不是没希望的，就看什么因缘底下和什么相应。
感恩！感恩！感恩！佛法无不在生活上。佛法原本就在生命中的每一分每一秒。
《萬物靜觀皆自得》~叶云舟
你抵抗什麼，什麼就會擴大，
你靜觀什麼，什麼就會消失。
不管正面的問題是:與人衝突、
爭吵，或是受人批評、攻擊、侮辱，
如果你去對抗，問題就會擴大
且持續下去。
我們都可以了解，只要有對抗，
就會有衝突，就會有對立，
而衝突和對立，又會引發憤怒、
怨懟、攻擊，然後就沒完沒了。
反之，只要讓自己沉靜下來，
那麼不論你靜觀什麼，
什麼就會消失。
你不需費心去找任何理由為自己
辨護，只要沉靜下來，你的舉止
本身就會顯示最好的理由。
你不需費力去爭執，
只要沉靜下來，
你連想都不用想，
正確的言語自然就會產生。.
你不需刻意去控制情緒，
只要沉靜下來，什麼都不說，
什麼都不做，什麼都不計較，
心境自然平靜。
所謂萬物靜觀皆自得，
我們只要把心沉靜下來，
直到心田的淤泥沉澱，
湖水自然澄清。
你的困擾自然也就消失不見了。
阿含經中提到，
佛陀在為信徒開示時，
總要先「令其心調柔」
才為其說「法」
（善言正語）。
所以祝福你保有一顆容易感動的心、
柔軟的心、慈悲的心，
你靜觀什麼，什麼就會消失。
不管正面的問題是:與人衝突、
爭吵，或是受人批評、攻擊、侮辱，
如果你去對抗，問題就會擴大
且持續下去。
我們都可以了解，只要有對抗，
就會有衝突，就會有對立，
而衝突和對立，又會引發憤怒、
怨懟、攻擊，然後就沒完沒了。
反之，只要讓自己沉靜下來，
那麼不論你靜觀什麼，
什麼就會消失。
你不需費心去找任何理由為自己
辨護，只要沉靜下來，你的舉止
本身就會顯示最好的理由。
你不需費力去爭執，
只要沉靜下來，
你連想都不用想，
正確的言語自然就會產生。.
你不需刻意去控制情緒，
只要沉靜下來，什麼都不說，
什麼都不做，什麼都不計較，
心境自然平靜。
所謂萬物靜觀皆自得，
我們只要把心沉靜下來，
直到心田的淤泥沉澱，
湖水自然澄清。
你的困擾自然也就消失不見了。
阿含經中提到，
佛陀在為信徒開示時，
總要先「令其心調柔」
才為其說「法」
（善言正語）。
所以祝福你保有一顆容易感動的心、
柔軟的心、慈悲的心，
Saturday, February 27, 2010
One inspiring CNY gathering with Ven Kai Bao... up in Bai Yun San
Dear Brother and Sister in the Dharma,
I think this must be an auspicious day to be able to meet up with Ven. Kai Bao up on the hill in Bai Yun San temple on the 5th day of CNY.
All of us were only informed the day before but I guess it was this 'Yuan' that made us able to make it to the meaningful event. :)
We were entertained with lion dance, good food cooked by Ven Kai Bao himself. And this great for the kids. :) All of us love the rojak made by Ven. Kai Bao.
Best of all, it was such an enlightening moment to be able to hear a short talk by Ven Kai Bao.
Candle was lit up and it was something like an endless light (Wu Jing Deng) night that we used to have.
Ven. Kai Bao told a story about 2 tribes during the Buddha time who were going to start a war over the water supply from the only river they shared. Then Buddha came and asked which is more valuable, the lives of the people in both tribes or the river?.
Often we fight or we chased after something which is less valuable than our own lives. To self check, always asked which is more valuable.
I have seldom make new year resolution as I had always have them almost left out by the end of the year. :P
But Ven Kai Bao looked like he has the 'power' of awakening, to wake up this sleeping learning spirit.
He reminded us on the start of the new year, let's try to be like the candle that is lit up and continue to bring light to other beings.
This may sound simple, but how I wish you were there to listen and contemplate that it also meant there is a journey for us to thread in the learning and propagating the Dharma.
It was a very special moment to light up a candle and make a resolution in front of the huge Kuan Yin statue(an image of compassion according to Ven Kai Bao).....(still remember this place?). I guess over the years, we have started to use different terminology like ‘Energy’, instead of the power of metta radiating. haha.
Never mind about this, as long as one still remembers that there is a Buddha seed implanted.
Ven Kai Bao also expressed that we, especially the Alumni of the PPB USM, should take up the initiative to continue with the Annual Reunion Camp, as this was where the sparks started thru PPBUSM.
We had one alumni camp last year with the attendants of ~25 ex-PPB members. We wished we could have another one this year.
I wish you were here that night, not only to have good food, though they were really sumptuous, but to know that a new year should begin with a heart closer to the Buddha.
I wish you were here in our next coming camp, not only to reminisce the good old times, but to know that there is always someone here to support and care in your life, be it the spiritual life, working life and family life.
We were up on the hill together to plant a new seed:
Bro Chew Yiap
Sis. Bao Xue
Sis. Peik Yin and her son
Bro. Chong Sing, Sis. Hwa Siew and their 2 sons, Jaysen and Jayden
Bro Kenny and Sis. Mui Geok
Sis. Cheu Peng (our present PPB advisor...ehm ehm just upgraded), her hubby Ngoh, and their son, Eugene
Bro. Chun Chin
Sis. Sin Dee, Bro. Yong Joon and their daughters, Jo Ee and Jo Von
Bro. Yu Kang & his wife, Yuki.
Bro. Ah Eng
May all the good deeds be with you and all beings!
May you be well and happy!
Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!
I think this must be an auspicious day to be able to meet up with Ven. Kai Bao up on the hill in Bai Yun San temple on the 5th day of CNY.
All of us were only informed the day before but I guess it was this 'Yuan' that made us able to make it to the meaningful event. :)
We were entertained with lion dance, good food cooked by Ven Kai Bao himself. And this great for the kids. :) All of us love the rojak made by Ven. Kai Bao.
Best of all, it was such an enlightening moment to be able to hear a short talk by Ven Kai Bao.
Candle was lit up and it was something like an endless light (Wu Jing Deng) night that we used to have.
Ven. Kai Bao told a story about 2 tribes during the Buddha time who were going to start a war over the water supply from the only river they shared. Then Buddha came and asked which is more valuable, the lives of the people in both tribes or the river?.
Often we fight or we chased after something which is less valuable than our own lives. To self check, always asked which is more valuable.
I have seldom make new year resolution as I had always have them almost left out by the end of the year. :P
But Ven Kai Bao looked like he has the 'power' of awakening, to wake up this sleeping learning spirit.
He reminded us on the start of the new year, let's try to be like the candle that is lit up and continue to bring light to other beings.
This may sound simple, but how I wish you were there to listen and contemplate that it also meant there is a journey for us to thread in the learning and propagating the Dharma.
It was a very special moment to light up a candle and make a resolution in front of the huge Kuan Yin statue(an image of compassion according to Ven Kai Bao).....(still remember this place?). I guess over the years, we have started to use different terminology like ‘Energy’, instead of the power of metta radiating. haha.
Never mind about this, as long as one still remembers that there is a Buddha seed implanted.
Ven Kai Bao also expressed that we, especially the Alumni of the PPB USM, should take up the initiative to continue with the Annual Reunion Camp, as this was where the sparks started thru PPBUSM.
We had one alumni camp last year with the attendants of ~25 ex-PPB members. We wished we could have another one this year.
I wish you were here that night, not only to have good food, though they were really sumptuous, but to know that a new year should begin with a heart closer to the Buddha.
I wish you were here in our next coming camp, not only to reminisce the good old times, but to know that there is always someone here to support and care in your life, be it the spiritual life, working life and family life.
We were up on the hill together to plant a new seed:
Bro Chew Yiap
Sis. Bao Xue
Sis. Peik Yin and her son
Bro. Chong Sing, Sis. Hwa Siew and their 2 sons, Jaysen and Jayden
Bro Kenny and Sis. Mui Geok
Sis. Cheu Peng (our present PPB advisor...ehm ehm just upgraded), her hubby Ngoh, and their son, Eugene
Bro. Chun Chin
Sis. Sin Dee, Bro. Yong Joon and their daughters, Jo Ee and Jo Von
Bro. Yu Kang & his wife, Yuki.
Bro. Ah Eng
May all the good deeds be with you and all beings!
May you be well and happy!
Sadhu! Sadhu! Sadhu!
Friday, December 18, 2009
Handmade reward chart
Wanted to get a reward chart for the girls long time ago.
But it's always the price that put me off --- a daunting RM 70 or more, just for some removable and stickable cartoons!
Then i realized that i have actually had all the resources, why not DIY?
I have some leftover microfiber cloths, leftover of cotton and flannel fabrics, and snaps button. Just need to get more velcro and also reusing a stick.
1. Fold down the microfiber to form a loop so that it hold on the stick.
2. Mark and snap the button on the microfiber cloth with two males on top and two females at the place just below the stick.
3. Cut out the cute cartoon prints on the cotton and flannel fabrics and sew the velcro at the back. We have snoppy, hello kitty, strawberry, bear, assorted flowers.
4. The end result:
5. The back of the removable, washable reward 'sticker', with velcro stitched at the back.:
6. Velcro sticked well on microfiber without having to have another side of the velcro sewn on the back fabric.
7. And all these cost me only RM 3.50 for the 1 m of velcro. If I didn't use up all the velcro previously, this item will be totally FOC!
The girls are so excited with it! We use that to reward them when they do the cleanup, help mummy to prepare food, behave themselves, etc.
But it's always the price that put me off --- a daunting RM 70 or more, just for some removable and stickable cartoons!
Then i realized that i have actually had all the resources, why not DIY?
I have some leftover microfiber cloths, leftover of cotton and flannel fabrics, and snaps button. Just need to get more velcro and also reusing a stick.
1. Fold down the microfiber to form a loop so that it hold on the stick.
2. Mark and snap the button on the microfiber cloth with two males on top and two females at the place just below the stick.
3. Cut out the cute cartoon prints on the cotton and flannel fabrics and sew the velcro at the back. We have snoppy, hello kitty, strawberry, bear, assorted flowers.
4. The end result:
5. The back of the removable, washable reward 'sticker', with velcro stitched at the back.:
6. Velcro sticked well on microfiber without having to have another side of the velcro sewn on the back fabric.
7. And all these cost me only RM 3.50 for the 1 m of velcro. If I didn't use up all the velcro previously, this item will be totally FOC!
The girls are so excited with it! We use that to reward them when they do the cleanup, help mummy to prepare food, behave themselves, etc.
About homeopathy again.... and vaccination
Recommended Dr Ooi's homeopathy to Hooi Ling.
It's has always been our (hubby and me) common recommendation to concern parents who are worried about sending little kiddos to pediatricians who may intend to prescribe overdose or unnecessary medication. Dr. Ooi's kindness and patience has been the key point for us to share.
Google about homeopathy and only realized that the founder, Hahnemann, was whom we had studied before in primary school about quinine and its healing power on malaria.
Thanks to homepathy, little JV has never been on paracetamol, cough mixture, not to mention antibiobiotics and antihisthamine --- not needed anymore.
JV was throwing out paracetamol ever since when she 3 months. For every jab under the vaccination program, paracetamol was just an untouched FREE gift from the Klinik Kesihatan.
p/s: I purposely skipped MMR for both JV and JE.
Why not measles? I mean why not let children get measles? We all do get in during childhood day and as according to many natural healing beliefs, measles is just a self adjusment way of the body to get rid of food from wrong feeding.
Why not mumps? I mean we all get that too. No big deal at all. Just some 'nila' and few days to recuperate at home.
Why not rubella? I get that jab during Form 3. The earliest we should get should be at age 12. So why forced the little body to get the vaccine so early?
Why spoil our body own antibody system?
It's has always been our (hubby and me) common recommendation to concern parents who are worried about sending little kiddos to pediatricians who may intend to prescribe overdose or unnecessary medication. Dr. Ooi's kindness and patience has been the key point for us to share.
Google about homeopathy and only realized that the founder, Hahnemann, was whom we had studied before in primary school about quinine and its healing power on malaria.
Thanks to homepathy, little JV has never been on paracetamol, cough mixture, not to mention antibiobiotics and antihisthamine --- not needed anymore.
JV was throwing out paracetamol ever since when she 3 months. For every jab under the vaccination program, paracetamol was just an untouched FREE gift from the Klinik Kesihatan.
p/s: I purposely skipped MMR for both JV and JE.
Why not measles? I mean why not let children get measles? We all do get in during childhood day and as according to many natural healing beliefs, measles is just a self adjusment way of the body to get rid of food from wrong feeding.
Why not mumps? I mean we all get that too. No big deal at all. Just some 'nila' and few days to recuperate at home.
Why not rubella? I get that jab during Form 3. The earliest we should get should be at age 12. So why forced the little body to get the vaccine so early?
Why spoil our body own antibody system?
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
A birthday party to cherish and remember
It has always been hubby's dream to have something special for FIL. Being brought up in a conservative and traditional family, I can understand that it is definitely not an easy task to ....even hug your dad!
(I have that 'funny' feeling too when I first thought of hugging my mom and dad too!)
The inspiration came when hubby was contemplating his favorite video clip: 《爱和关怀》
He decided to have this kneel-down-tea-session during FIL 73 yrs old birthday celebration.
With the intention of, telling him that:
- how much he loves FIL
- FIL is loved by all
- and also to put down one's ego when kneeling down.
Well, don't let yourself feeling regret later when you know that you didnt do something that you should have done when your parents are alive, right?
FIL eyes were welled with tears when hubby kneel down and hugged him.
This was followed by SILs.
Then the last but not least, VIP MIL --- the most important person in FIL life, guess he has longed for love and recognition from MIL ever since a long long time ago.
MIL was actually quite reluctant to hug FIL, but you can see that FIL quickly hugged her when MIL approached him. How cute!
Hubby said at least he has accomplished the dream of bringing FIL to China lately.
I said this is the first time I see him seeing eyes to eyes with FIL too....so encouraging! :)
A big Sadhu to Tzu Chi for bringing this wonderful inspiration.
May the Lord Buddha bless FIL, MIL and all who make this birthday celebration a successful and memorable event be in peace, love and harmony!
(I have that 'funny' feeling too when I first thought of hugging my mom and dad too!)
The inspiration came when hubby was contemplating his favorite video clip: 《爱和关怀》
He decided to have this kneel-down-tea-session during FIL 73 yrs old birthday celebration.
With the intention of, telling him that:
- how much he loves FIL
- FIL is loved by all
- and also to put down one's ego when kneeling down.
Well, don't let yourself feeling regret later when you know that you didnt do something that you should have done when your parents are alive, right?
FIL eyes were welled with tears when hubby kneel down and hugged him.
This was followed by SILs.
Then the last but not least, VIP MIL --- the most important person in FIL life, guess he has longed for love and recognition from MIL ever since a long long time ago.
MIL was actually quite reluctant to hug FIL, but you can see that FIL quickly hugged her when MIL approached him. How cute!
Hubby said at least he has accomplished the dream of bringing FIL to China lately.
I said this is the first time I see him seeing eyes to eyes with FIL too....so encouraging! :)
A big Sadhu to Tzu Chi for bringing this wonderful inspiration.
May the Lord Buddha bless FIL, MIL and all who make this birthday celebration a successful and memorable event be in peace, love and harmony!
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